The Boobless Bitch is Back

And I'm here to stay (round of applause). Joo know joo miss me. So much to say, so I think I'll stay a while. It's been almost a year and well, a lot has happened. I have foobs....and fipples, a year of work under my belt post cancer, and well more hormones than the boys locker room at any local high school.

God Bless these knockers right hurrrrr. <----------

So here's the 411 on your favorite girl from the 214. I'm trying not to be long winded so like here's the Cliff Notes version of my life.

-Recovery after a pulmonary embolism was hard. I don't recommend getting one. Aside from the endless supply of popsicles, it just wasn't that much fun.
- Back to work post cancer, not as difficult as throwing up fire and shitting brimstone, but a close second, and by close I'm talking Olympic swimming 400 meter freestyle where erry'body touches the wall at the same damn time.
-Brick tit swap surgery aka Tissue Expanders vs. Silicon Gummy Gel goodness. Definitely the highlight of my cancer journey (did I just say that? Jee-Zeus I need therapy). Be sure to work out before hand....your welcome.
-Snarky ass bitches and the lack of fucks given after a first class trip to hell. Such a hard balance. There's a thin line between telling someone what you really think and wanting to stay gainfully employed.
-Dogs. A whole lot of fur on the carpet.
-Having to pull over on the way home from work to sleep....so tired.
-Water Retention, I think after almost two years of it I'm finally done. After a hard day I still sport the cankles, but it's not a daily struggle anymore thank God.
-Still NED (no evidence of disease). No one says remission anymore, get with the times.
-Stop asking me if I'm still cancer free, that shit is really dumb. Ask me how my day was or how I'm feeling.
-Happy Bday hubs! <3
-My LAST infusion! Bittersweet memories, that is all I'm taking with MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
-Fun times in Waikiki with the GUncles-that's Gay Uncles for all you that are lacking in the lingo
-You've Got NIPPLES/FIPPLES, and Bye Schaenna Felicia
-Xmas drama, I see you lying....you hatin'. Bon voyage siblings, no more fucks given.
-Chemotherapy induced alopecia of the brows and lashes. AKA chemo gave me alopecia AKA my brows and lashes will never grow back AKA sob
-Sleetpocalypse.
-Lower back degeneration
-Trying to lose the water weight
-Trying to lose the regular weight
-LOW LOW LOW Vitamin D
-Yay I'm 32
-I'm so tired, you don't even know!
-Chemo room for fluids
-stomach flu
-low ovarian reserve or Lupron? Only time will tell
-2nd wedding anniversary
-more fluids, having an oncologist in your life is a straight hookup to the IV when you are dehydrated. Kinda cool.
-Fake Christian people and the psychos that follow them. I will not be one of them since I worship of the Catholic Church of treat everyone with kindness and respect, especially breast cancer survivors.
-Brow Tattoo. WORST. PAIN. OF. MY. LIFE
-My friend died.....unexpectedly. That really sucked :(
-Can you ever just worry about yourself?
-Running, 5k, so hard, in Texas heat! Hubs started running too!
-AC Units died....holy financial drama Batman
-No more fakeness in my life
-Summa Summa Summa time!

So now that you are caught up here's what I hope to talk about or at least shed some light on. The AFTER. NO ONE ever really talks about the after. As in life after going through the cancer journey. Did you KNOW your life is NOT the same? No one really addresses that fact. It takes FOREVER to get back to a sense of normalcy and then you realize that you will never ever be "normal" again. That's a hard pill to swallow, and it takes some time to even realize that. You won't get your life back, something will always be different. You are different. Your relationships are different. Hell, you may be a completely different person. One thing is for sure, your tolerance for people's bull will be NIL. Don't say I didn't warn ya!

I'm hoping to come to you every Tuesday with some of my boobless insight. Looking forward to it.

XOXO,

                                                                    The Boob Chica